Philadelphia Film Festival ’07: Eagle vs Shark

Posted in2000s, 2007, Authors: Ian Pugh, Comedy, Film Festivals, New Zealand, Romance, ZERO STARS
ZERO STARS/**** starring Loren Horsley, Jemaine Clement, Joel Tobeck, Craig Hall written and directed by Taika Waititi by Ian Pugh Perhaps the most creatively null film since the remake of When a Stranger Calls, Eagle vs Shark doesn't just feel like Napoleon Dynamite, doesn't just owe its existence to Napoleon Dynamite--it practically fucking is Napoleon Dynamite, and God help you if you need another one of those. The only difference, really, is that it takes place in New Zealand and focuses more on the romantic angle: shortly after she is ousted from her job at a fast-food joint, quiet loser…

Philadelphia Film Festival ’07: Dante’s Inferno

Posted in2000s, 2007, Animation, Authors: Ian Pugh, Comedy, Esoterica, Film Festivals
*/**** screenplay by Paul Zaloom, Sandow Burk & Sean Meredith directed by Sean Meredith by Ian Pugh Dante Alighieri (voice of Dermot Mulroney) is a drunken slacker and Virgil (James Cromwell) packs heat in a 21st-century update of The Inferno populated entirely by puppets crafted from paper--and that's about as far as it goes for cleverness in Sean Meredith's Dante's Inferno, but at least the puppets are well-drawn. Although the concept is daring and the toy theatre action is beautifully choreographed, the intrinsic problem in modernizing the first third of The Divine Comedy is that you're more or less obliged…

Philadelphia Film Festival ’07: Zoo

Posted in****/****, 2007, Authors: Ian Pugh, Documentary, Film Festivals
****/**** directed by Robinson Devor by Ian Pugh Constructed as a series of dream-like, blue-tinted re-enactments anonymously narrated (and sometimes acted out in silhouette) by the people involved, Zoo--so named for an apparently in-crowd nickname for "zoophile"--documents a small group of individuals gathered together on a ranch in Washington, one of the few states in the union where bestiality is "not illegal," to hang out and share their love for animals; their illusions of solitude are shattered, however, when one of them dies from a perforated colon after having sex with a horse. The zoophiles are portrayed here as fairly…

Philadelphia Film Festival ’07: The King of Kong

Posted in2000s, 2007, Authors: Ian Pugh, Biopic, Documentary, Film Festivals, Sports
The King of Kong: A Fistful of Quarters **/**** directed by Seth Gordon by Ian Pugh Sarcastically described as Rocky for video games, The King of Kong is superficially about how human beings will latch on to any opportunity to acquire fame and admiration--but really it's about how easy it is to laugh at nerds. The documentary follows the subculture of obsessive retro gaming, because there's a shake-up in the works: junior-high science teacher and family man Steve Wiebe is closing the gap on the (world-record) high score for "Donkey Kong" held by pretentious hot-sauce mogul Billy Mitchell. These middle-aged…

Philadelphia Film Festival ’07: Sisters

Posted in2000s, 2007, Authors: Ian Pugh, Canada, Crime, Film Festivals, Horror, Mystery, Thriller, UK
**/**** starring Chloë Sevigny, Dallas Roberts, Lou Doillon, Stephen Rea screenplay by Douglas Buck & John Freitas, based on an earlier screenplay by Brian De Palma & Louisa Rose directed by Douglas Buck by Ian Pugh Perhaps a little too earnest for its own good, Douglas Buck's Sisters takes one of Brian De Palma's most transparent tributes to Hitchcock and almost completely abandons its homage-laden aesthetic, convinced that saddling everyone with even more psychological baggage would somehow expand on the previous film's chilling ideas about identity panic. The basic structure remains the same: attempting to escape the grasp of her…

Philadelphia Film Festival ’07: The Boss of It All

Posted in2000s, 2007, Authors: Ian Pugh, Comedy, Denmark, Esoterica, Film Festivals, France, Germany, Iceland, Italy, Sweden
Direktøren for det hele ***/**** starring Jens Albinus, Peter Gantzler, Iben Hjejle, Fridrik Thor Fridrikson written and directed by Lars von Trier by Ian Pugh Presenting himself to us as an image reflected in a window, Lars von Trier literally begins The Boss of It All with an assurance that the following hundred minutes will be nothing more than a light comedy not worth "a moment's reflection." He then introduces us to pretentious, untalented actor Kristoffer (Jens Albinus), who has been hired by office worker Ravn (Peter Gantzler) to pose as the company's absentee president in delicate negotiations to merge…

Philadelphia Film Festival ’07: The Ten

Posted in2000s, 2007, Authors: Ian Pugh, Comedy, Film Festivals, Mexico, Romance

½*/****
starring Paul Rudd, Adam Brody, Rob Corddry, Jessica Alba
screenplay by Ken Marino & David Wain
directed by David Wain

by Ian Pugh Along with ninjas and pirates, Jesus is a popular target of hipster irony because the idea of throwing such a deadly-serious figurehead into a light of silliness, informality, and kitsch seems automatically hilarious–and it may have been, once upon a time, before Jesus bobbleheads, Jesus magic eight-balls, and Dogma‘s Buddy Christ drove it right into the ground. The joke is so easy, in fact, that I wouldn’t be surprised if the notion of Jesus as a prosthetic-leg salesman occurred to David Wain before anything else about his anthology The Ten–even the concept itself: ten sketches revolving around the Ten Commandments with vaguely intertwining scenarios and characters. The structure is crafted with such petulance as to suggest that Wain and co-writer Ken Marino read a short review of Kieslowski’s Dekalog and flat-out refused to give the matter any further thought–a dismissive attitude that comes naturally to the hipster culture and permeates the entirety of this anthology.

Sundance ’07: Low and Behold

Posted in2000s, 2007, Authors: Alex Jackson, Drama, Film Festivals, Sundance

½*/****
starring Barlow Jacobs, Robert Longstreet, Eddie Rouse
screenplay by Zack Godshall & Barlow Jacobs
directed by Zack Godshall

by Alex Jackson I absolutely despise Zack Godshall’s Low and Behold. If there is a just and loving God governing the cosmos, it will be the worst movie I see all year; there should be a provision in the Patriot Act ensuring that these people never receive the funding to make another film. Turner Stull (co-writer Barlow Jacobs) has arrived in post-Katrina New Orleans to take a job as an insurance claims adjuster that his crude Uncle “Stully” has set up for him. Turner is reluctantly learning the ropes when he meets factory worker Nixon (Eddie Rouse, the uncle in George Washington). Seeing that Turner needs help checking the roofs, Nixon offers to trade his services for a ride around town to look for his daughters’ lost dog. Essentially, the film is a comedy–a really terrible one. Godshall scores lots of easy points against the uncle’s crassness and avarice: Stully is giddy about the fact that he has so many claims to process post-Katrina, he sees it as a big payday. Nevertheless, Godshall strains to satirize the callousness of the claims adjustment industry, apparently believing them to be soulless because they don’t visit people who haven’t filed a claim and won’t authorize payouts on houses with minimal damage. Obviously, if they could they would, as that would mean they would earn a higher commission–something Turner even points out for us. How could a film about Hurricane Katrina be this politically impotent? Turner’s naïveté is the secondary source of laffs.

Sundance ’07: Year of the Fish

Posted in2000s, 2007, Animation, Authors: Alex Jackson, Fantasy, Film Festivals, Romance, Sundance
**/**** starring Tsai Chin, Randall Duk Kim, Ken Leung, An Nguyen written and directed by David Kaplan by Alex Jackson I'm not quite sure why David Kaplan's Year of the Fish doesn't work, but I think it might have something to do with a fundamentally tainted central concept: the Cinderella story retold with a Chinese girl being sold into slavery in New York's Chinatown district. Cinderella is Ye Xian (An Nguyen), which was Cinderella's real name in the original Chinese folktale published a good 800 years before the better-known Perrault version. Xian must reimburse her benefactor for the cost of…

Sundance ’07: The Go-Getter

Posted in2000s, 2007, Authors: Alex Jackson, Comedy, Drama, Film Festivals, Sundance

**½/****
starring Lou Taylor Pucci, Zooey Deschanel, Jena Malone, Judy Greer
written and directed by Martin Hynes

by Alex Jackson Two columns of note recently circulated in the blogosphere. The first was Richard Corliss’s “The Trouble with Sundance,” in which Corliss complains that Sundance movies have become formulaic and predictable, effectively snuffing out the fresh, original voices the festival was supposed to be cultivating. The second article was a partial rebuttal by David Bordwell that sheds light on the phenomenon of what he calls “Indie Guignol”: independent filmmakers trying to outdo one another in sensationalistic brutality. Compared to entries in the “Sundance genre,” i.e., films typically involving dysfunctional families that strive to reconnect, oftentimes through road trips (the Oscar-nominated Little Miss Sunshine would be considered prototypical), these pictures are not mainstream, but they’re considered by critics to have more artistic merit. And yet, particularly because we can easily recognize the phenomenon, it’s losing its legitimacy as art. “Very often the predictable nonconformist is just as orthodox as the conformist,” Bordwell writes. I thought about this while watching Martin Hynes’s The Go-Getter, a film that subtly breaks away from Indie Guignol by embracing the possibly more passé Sundance genre. After Fido, Teeth, We Are The Strange, Hounddog, Strange Culture, and Low and Behold, all decidedly non-commercial films that take lots of chances and fail miserably, I have to admit I was happy to see something that gave me a few simple guiltless pleasures. Yes, Sundance films have become their own genre, but what the fuck is wrong with genre, anyway? Are you really a movie lover if you can’t enjoy a solid but generic horror film, war film, noir, romantic comedy, western, and/or musical?

Sundance ’07: Strange Culture

Posted in2000s, 2007, Authors: Alex Jackson, Documentary, Drama, Film Festivals, Sundance
*/**** starring Thomas Jay Ryan, Tilda Swinton, Peter Coyote written and directed by Lynn Hershman Leeson by Alex Jackson On May 11, 2004, artist and college professor Steve Kurtz called 911 to report the death of his wife Hope by heart failure. When medics arrived, they saw his art supplies and called the FBI: in preparing an installation that would let patrons test whether food had been genetically modified, Kurtz had ordered biological materials over the Internet. The feds detained Kurtz as a suspected terrorist and confiscated his equipment. After a grand jury rejected the charges of terrorism, Uncle Sam…

Sundance ’07: VHS – Kahloucha

Posted in2000s, 2007, Authors: Alex Jackson, Documentary, Film Festivals, Sundance, Tunisia
**/**** directed by Nejib Belkadhi by Alex Jackson There may very well be a Pauline Kael review for every occasion. For VHS - Kahloucha, it's her dismissal of Francois Truffaut's Day for Night: "[It's] a movie for the movie-struck, the essentially naïve--those who would rather see a movie, any movie (a bad one, a stupid one, or an evanescent, sweet-but-dry little wafer of a movie like this one), than do anything else." Ayup, that about covers it. This documentary portrait of amateur Tunisian filmmaker Moncef Kahloucha never makes the mistake of condescending to its subject, but it never quite elucidates…

Sundance ’07: Chapter 27

Posted in****/****, 2000s, 2007, Authors: Alex Jackson, Biopic, Canada, Crime, Drama, Film Festivals, Sundance
****/**** starring Jared Leto, Lindsay Lohan, Judah Friedlander, Ursula Abbott written and directed by Jarrett Schaefer by Alex Jackson Chapter 27 is creepy and possibly even unhealthy. I've been wondering for a couple of days now just how long writer-director Jarrett Schaefer stared into the Nietzsche abyss in researching and helming this aggressively subjective look into the mind of Beatle assassin Mark David Chapman. He purports to share Chapman's adoration of The Catcher in the Rye, The Beatles, and The Wizard of Oz and in person comes off as shy and somewhat withdrawn. What I find particularly disturbing is how…

Sundance ’07: It is Fine! Everything is Fine.

Posted in2000s, 2007, Authors: Alex Jackson, Disability, Drama, Film Festivals, Sundance

It is Fine! EVERYTHING IS FINE.
**/****
starring Margit Carstensen, Steven C. Stewart, Carrie Szlasa, Lauren German
screenplay by Steven C. Stewart
directed by David Brothers & Crispin Hellion Glover

by Alex Jackson An unlikely figurehead of Salt Lake’s independent film scene, Crispin Glover shot portions of his directorial debut What is It? in the city and cast local native Steven C. Stewart in the role of “Duelling Demi-God Auteur and the young man’s inner ego” against his own “Duelling Demi-God Auteur and the young man’s inner psyche.” (A great deal of the affection the townies seem to harbour for Glover and his films apparently stems from foolish local pride.) Stewart, who suffered from severe cerebral palsy and died from a collapsed lung shortly before the release of What is It?, wrote and stars in It is fine! EVERYTHING IS FINE.. The script was dictated almost thirty years ago to scenic artist and production designer David Brothers, who worked on several Utah-area productions such as The World’s Fastest Indian. Brothers introduced Glover to Stewart’s script and co-directed it with him; as with What is It?, It is fine! EVERYTHING IS FINE. is a lot more interesting to hear about than it is to watch.

Sundance ’07: Hounddog

Posted in2000s, 2007, Authors: Alex Jackson, Drama, Film Festivals, Music, Sundance

*/****
starring Dakota Fanning, Robin Wright Penn, David Morse, Piper Laurie
written and directed by Deborah Kampmeier

by Alex Jackson Deborah Kampmeier’s Hounddog is even worse than its pre-emptive objectors assume it is. The film is offensive in precisely the way you think it’s going to be but surprises you by becoming offensive on a whole new level. Everything in the film revolves around a scene where Dakota Fanning is raped, which, far from “gratuitous,” is the film’s entire raison d’être. Before The Rape, Hounddog plays like one big striptease leading up to it: in the very first scene, Fanning promises her playmate a kiss if he shows her his penis, and throughout the picture, Kampmeier has her prancing around in her panties, gyrating in her rendition of Elvis Presley’s “Hounddog,” and going swimming in an undershirt. Naysayers are calling the picture “a pedophile’s dream,” and though I maintain that you would have to be a pedophile of particularly low self-esteem to whack off to this, they do have a point. Up until The Rape, the film is just plain exploitive and cynical. It starts to seem like Kampmeier knows why we’re here and is going to draw out our dread/anticipation past the breaking point before delivering “the goods.” Then little Dakota gets popped. The scene is simultaneously cowardly, leering, and utterly tasteless: we see close-ups of her limbs flailing and her playmate staring on, fascinated and horrified. Her demonic rapist, who had been hiding in the shadows, grunts a couple of times, comes inside her, and very audibly zips up as she lies on the ground, bawling and defeated. The pre-rape portion of the film was sweating with sex, but all that heat dissipates during and after the rape.

Sundance ’07: We Are the Strange

Posted in2000s, 2007, Action, Adventure, Animation, Authors: Alex Jackson, Fantasy, Film Festivals, Sundance

½*/****
starring David Choe, Stuart Mahoney, Halleh Seddighzadeh, M dot Strange
written and directed by M dot Strange

by Alex Jackson

“Yeah, but your scientists were so preoccupied with whether or not they could, they didn’t stop to think if they should.”
-Dr. Ian Malcolm (Jeff Goldblum) in Jurassic Park

While it is perfectly normal for a student filmmaker to be preoccupied with the “could” questions over the “should,” the “should” questions need asking and answering to at least some extent before one attempts to make something for display to a general audience. I suppose I could say that We Are the Strange is an exercise in style over substance, or that it breaks away from traditional forms of narrative, but that would imply that writer/producer/director/animator/composer M dot Strange had actually made choices with regards to substance, narrative, and the lack thereof. The film is an artistic failure on the most rudimentary level; it seems that Strange never got past the idea that it would be cool to make an animated feature. We Are the Strange has something to do with a beautiful woman named Blue who is kicked out of a brothel by her pimp for being “ugly.” She then meets the living Buddy doll Emmm, who asks her out for ice cream. Soon they discover that the ice cream shop has been taken over by “evil forces.” All of this is set in a video game or an alternate universe composed of video game graphics or something.

Sundance ’07: Joe Strummer: The Future is Unwritten

Posted in2000s, 2007, Authors: Alex Jackson, Documentary, Film Festivals, Ireland, Music, Sundance, UK
***/**** directed by Julien Temple by Alex Jackson I worry that this film was wasted on me. I usually walk out of the Q&A sessions after festival screenings because I can't bear to hear the stupid questions the audience asks or, as in the case of M dot Strange, the filmmaker's stupid answers. This time, however, the questions were intelligent and thoughtful, and, it almost goes without saying, so were the replies. Watching Joe Strummer: The Future is Unwritten, I was reminded a bit of those critics who said that The Passion of the Christ was made for hardcore Christians…

Sundance ’07: Crazy Love

Posted in2000s, 2007, Authors: Alex Jackson, Documentary, Film Festivals, Sundance

***½/****
directed by Dan Klores and Fisher Stevens

by Alex Jackson Dan Klores’s Crazy Love is essentially just another talking-head documentary, but my goodness what talking heads they are! At first, it seems that Klores–to echo that oft-repeated charge against pop-doc filmmakers like Errol Morris, Michael Moore, and Chris Smith–is condescending to his subjects by laying their distinctly Jewish tackiness out to be skewered. But as the picture soldiers on, any emotional detachment dissolves away: these people aren’t tactless so much as they’re simply candid. They have absolutely nothing to hide, and that openness makes it extremely difficult to categorize anybody in the film as a monster or a victim. Burt Pugach was a prominent negligence lawyer in the East Bronx; in the fall of 1957, he spotted secretary Linda Riss, fell in love with her, and successfully seduced her. When he couldn’t divorce his wife, Riss left him and got engaged to somebody else. Enraged and deeply depressed, Pugach hired some goons to rough her up. They threw acid in her face, eventually blinding her. Pugach served a stint in prison, and when he got out he proposed to Riss. She accepted–the way she figures it, she’s blind and nobody wants her or is willing to be with her except Pugach, who was the one who blinded her in the first place, explicitly so that nobody else would want her. He “wins.”

Sundance ’07: Fido

Posted in2000s, 2007, Authors: Alex Jackson, Canada, Comedy, Drama, Film Festivals, Horror, Sci-Fi, Sundance, Zombie
*/**** starring Carrie-Anne Moss, Billy Connolly, Dylan Baker, Tim Blake Nelson screenplay by Dennis Heaton, Robert Chomiak, Andrew Currie directed by Andrew Currie by Alex Jackson The first five or ten minutes of Fido are pretty terrific. Therein, an educational film depicts the "zombie wars," a time during the Forties in which space-dust turned our dead into zombies. The living won the ensuing conflict; and with the invention of the domestication collar by mega-corporation Zomcom, the zombies could be made to serve man. This movie-within-the-movie is in Academy ratio and grainy black-and-white, and when it finishes, a grade-school teacher turns…

Sundance ’07: Teeth

Posted in2000s, 2007, Authors: Alex Jackson, Film Festivals, Horror, Sundance, Thriller
*½/**** starring Jess Weixler, John Hensley, Josh Pais, Hale Appleman written and directed by Mitchell Lichtenstein by Alex Jackson I was very excited when I first stumbled upon the notion of the vagina dentata, as it provides for a distinctly female version of sexual aggression: Unlike the male rape drive, it's not about power, it's about taking power away from men--cannibalism and castration. I should have known that Mitchell Lichtenstein's Teeth would not be the film to really explore this notion as soon as I learned that it's literally about a teenage girl who discovers she has teeth in her…